Our Easter Announcement

This year for Easter the grandparents each received a basket with a SURPRISE in the bottom!


...So yes, we are having another baby!

And, if you ask Martin the real feat in this situation is that I actually made it over TEN WEEKS without telling anyone. I've never known myself to be so secretive!

I'm eleven weeks today!

Rock and Roll

Aubrey: Mom, this is a Rock and Roll Song! Sing with me!
Aubrey: (as loud as she possible can. Over and over for the duration of the song) ROCK AND ROLL! ROCK AND ROLL! ROCK AND ROLL! 

Construction

Aubrey: Mommy, where are we going?
Me: To grandma's house. The bridge is out on our road so we have to ALL the way around the long way to get to her house.
Aubrey: (pause) Mom! I got an idea! When we get to grandma's house I can get my tools and then I can help fix the bridge! That way we can drive down the road!
Me: Ok, that sounds like a great idea, Aubrey.

arriving at my mom's house.

Aubrey: Great Grandpa Leclair! We need to go get my tools so I can help fix the bridge!
GGL: I think you're going to need some machines to fix that bridge.
Aubrey: I know! My tools are machines!

Potty Dance

Aubrey: (dancing around)
Me: Are you okay, Aubrey.
Aubrey: Yeah. I just have to go potty. Don't you know the potty dance, mom? This is the dance you do when you have to go potty.

Frozen

within two minutes of Aubrey and Karalyn sitting down to eat dinner.

Aubrey: So, have you seen FROZEN???

some sort of conversation takes place, obviously resulting in a miscommunication, because not two minutes later.

Karalyn: (to Katie) Mommy, can you turn Frozen on? Aubrey hasn't seen it!

That movie is taking the toddler population by storm!

Freezing

Me: Aubrey, can you please put a coat on?
Aubrey: I don't want to wear a coat!
Me: Well, it's cold outside. If you don't wear a coat you're going to freeze your butt off!
Aubrey: Oh no! And then I'll never be able to go potty again!

That would be one terrible side effect of freezing your butt off.

One, Two, Three and to the Fo'

Aubrey: Ring around the rosy, pocket full of posies. .....We all FALL DOWN!
Martin: Hey Aubrey, how about you sing this song: One, Two, Three and to the Four. Snoop Doggy Dog and Dr. Dre are at the door!
Aubrey: Daddy, No! I don't want to sing that song!
Martin: Come on! Don't you want to sing the counting song?
Aubrey: Daddy, no.
Martin: Do you want mommy to sing?
Aubrey: Yeah!
Martin/Me: One, Two, Three and to the Four. Snoop Doggy Dog and Dr. Dre are at the door. 
Aubrey: No! Not that song! The ring around the rosy song!
Martin: Don't you want to learn the puppy song?
Aubrey: Daddy, no!
Martin: This is so frustrating. It's like she knows it's not a kids song!

Some of the bigger trials of parenting...obviously

My New Favorite Song

This is my new favorite song...its called Thunder Clatter by Wild Cub and it's Amazing! It's the type of song that really just warms my heart every time I hear it on the radio.

PS. I'm not actually that great with music but I've been listening to 107.7 pretty exclusively lately and they have GREAT music. If you live in the Rochester or Buffalo area you should definitely check it out!

You Know That Song

Shortly after a reunion of college roomates in the Baltimore airport

Amanda: So. I keep thinking about this song. I think you guys would really like it. .....Do you know what song I'm talking about???
Katie: What? No. Not based on that description.
Amanda: Well. It could be a line dance or it could be played at a rave. I can really see Jenna dancing to it. Do you know what song I'm talking about????
All of us: No. Definitely not. Try to sing some of it.
Amanda: Da. daaa.  I can't really think of the tune. You know! It could be at a rave OR a line dance!
All of us: We have no idea.
Zach: (starts searching for top forty songs on his phone and randomly calling off names)
Amanda: I think its a girl that sings it. It could be at a rave or a line dance. 

Two days later driving down red dirt roads in Georgia:

Ginny: Hey, I think this is the song Amanda was talking about!

And it was.

Post Wedding Trantrum

Me: Ok, Katie. It's time to leave. The wedding is over and our shuttle is leaving.

Katie: I don't want to leave. I want to keep dancing!

Me: Yeah. I know. But we're leaving. Come on.

Katie: I just want everyone to know that I AM NOT HAPPY WITH THIS DECISION!

back at the cabin.

Katie: I want to keep partying! I want to dance!

Me/Ginny: We'll stay up and hang out. But I'm pretty sure we're done partying.

Katie: I want to party! You guys are lame!

Me: I think you're being a little dramatic.

Katie: I want to be dramatic! I AM BEING DRAMATIC LIKE AUBREY!

Me: You've got to be kidding me (walks away into bathroom)

Katie: Oh fine! Walk away from me! You're lame!

Katie: They are having a party at the cabin next door. I'm going to go over there with those cool people!

Me: Bye Katie!

Ginny: Are you going to let her go there?

Me: She'll be back in five minutes.

...less than five minutes later

Katie: I did not fit in to that party. 

...Katie, we love you! Also, you know you're in a good place when you're legitimately comparing yourself to a three year old. 

Spirit Animal

Server: Hi, My name is Brandon. I'm going to be your server today.
Ingrid: What is your middle name Brandon
Brandon: Umm, people don't usually ask that. It's Joseph
Ingrid: That is solid
Brandon: Most of my friends call me BJ. You know, Brandon Joseph
Me: They do not call you BJ! Do you know that that means?!
Jolene: I'm pretty sure he knows what it means
BJ: Yeah. I like it. It's a good nickname. 
Ingrid: Ok. BJ.....what is your spirit animal?
BJ: My spirit animal...
Me: I'm thinking maybe Falcon
Ingrid: No, he's definitely a meerkat. I definitely see meerkat. Don't you?
BJ: Ummm.... I guess I could be a meerkat.

End of meal. At this point we know a lot about BJ. His nickname. College major. Dream job. Dream place to live. That he's the best man in his brother's wedding. That he likes to play mud volleyball while drinking. That he is 24. That he despises dark chocolate. Probably a few other things that I don't remember at this point.

BJ: Ok, with your bill I'm going to put a little survey card. You can go online and complete the survey. There are some questions about me also. I put my name on the back of the card. I actually put BJ. Normally I put Brandon because I don't usually get so personal with my guests. 

Got to Go Check Something

Aubrey: (walks by Ingrid)
Ingrid: Aubrey, did you just fart?
Aubrey: (smirking, sheepishly) Yessss.

...a few minutes later

Aubrey: (walks by Ingrid)
Ingrid: Aubrey, did you fart again??
Aubrey: (sheepishly, smirking) Yesss.
Me: Aubrey, did you fart or did you forget to wipe your butt?
Aubrey: (pause) Ummm....I just got to go check something

From the bathroom...
Aubrey: uh, MOM. We're gonna need some new underwear in here.

....
within 30 minutes

Aubrey: (exits bathroom)
Me: Aubrey, did you wipe your butt??
Aubrey: (annoyed) Yes Mom!
Me: Did you wash your hands?
Aubrey: (pause) I just have to go do something.

Frustrating

Aubrey is going through a very frustrating age where everything is a fight. Our interactions are either incredible or teetering somewhere between slightly frustrating to I want to die. There is no baseline. No happy medium. It's all poles around here. A few recent screams from my toddlers during a few of our many recent arguments

Aubrey: I DON'T WANT TO TAKE A BATH! I WANT TO BE DIRTY FOREVER!!
Me: Aubrey, you need to get clean. I don't really care what you want. 
Aubrey: GET ME DIRTY AGAIN! GET ME DIRTY AGAIN, NOW!
Me: If you want to get dirty you'll have to get yourself dirty (leaves Aubrey standing alone, and naked in the shower which is now turned off)
Aubrey: (for probably 15 minutes): I WANT YOU TO GET ME DIRTY! I DON'T WANT TO GET MYSELF DIRTY! GET ME DIRTY! YOU'RE RUINING MY DAY!

...

Me: Ok Aubrey, let's put your coat on and go home.
Aubrey: I DON'T WANT TO WEAR A COAT.
Me: Aubrey, it's cold outside and it's winter. You have to wear a coat. 
Aubrey: I DON'T WANT TO WEAR A COAT!
Me: Aubrey, Daddy was going to bring you home a chocolate milk tonight, do you still want him to do that?
Aubrey: Yes.
Me: Then you have to be a good girl and cooperate and put your coat on.
Aubrey: I DON'T WANT CHOCOLATE MILK! I DON'T WANT TO PUT MY COAT ON!
Me: Aubrey, what did I say this morning? I don't want everything to be a fight with you. 
Aubrey: I WANT EVERYTHING TO BE A FIGHT!!!

...

There's so many more - I can't even put them all into words. I'd show you a video, but it'd hurt your ears.

Three...whoever coined the phrase terrible twos clearly wasn't parenting my child.

Random Acts of Kindness

Me: It must have snowed last light because there is snow on the road, but there isn't any on my car so I think it all blew off.
Lexy: Yeah, I had about two inches on my car. 


...A couple days later....

I FINALLY realize that the reason the snow keeps "blowing" off my car before I wake up is because Martin is brushing it off when he leaves in the morning.

Me: Martin, are you brushing my car off in the morning?!
Martin: Of course, you my girl.
Me: That is so amazing! I can't believe I didn't thank you for this sooner!


...And that sums up why I am the easiest person to surprise. period.

Time

Me: You remember I'm working late tonight and you need to pick the girls up by 7:30, right?
Martin: Yeah. We've been doing really well lately. You can tell your mom that I might surprise everyone and be early!
Me: Yeah......I'm not going to do that.

hours later, just before 7:30

Me: So you're going to get the girls. 
Martin: Yeah. I'm driving through Shelby right now. 
Me: Oh, so you're going to surprise no one and be late.
Martin: Yeah... maybe by the time we hit our fiftieth wedding anniversary I'll have figured time management out. Sometimes even as I hear myself talk I think what am I thinking??

You Rock, Dude

Me: (putting toilet paper under the sink in the bathroom)

Aubrey: Mom, thanks for getting us that stuff. We totally needed it. You rock, dude!

Sick

Aubrey: Mommy, I REALLY don't want to be sick anymore!
Me: I know, honey. I really want you to feel better too.
Aubrey:  I really want to get better so I can drink the green milk Grandma got for me!

Bad For Your Body

Aubrey: (pointing the soda my niece has brought for us to share) Mom, you should drink that stuff. That stuff is bad for your body. 


The next morning, soda still sitting on the table

Aubrey: Mom. this stuff is bad for your body. You shouldn't drink it. 
Me: You are right, Aubrey. It is bad. 
Aubrey: Yeah. You can drink either milk or water. Milk comes from the cows and water comes from the sink.....Or should I say, from the water tower?

Cultured

Me: Ugh. These blankets are all messed up. They're not even covering your whole body!
Martin: Well, fix them if you want. I'm just going to lay here.
Me: Ok.......let's start from the very beginning.
Martin: (to musical tune) It's a very good place to start.
-pause-
Martin: You should be impressed with how cultured I am
Me: What? Cause you've seen the Sound of Music
Martin: I don't think very many people would sing that so quickly. 

The Sword in the Stone

Dental Hygienist: What is your favorite movie, Aubrey?
Aubrey: Well..... the BESTEST movie ever is.....THE SWORD IN THE STONE!
Dental Hygienist: Really. Wow. That's a different one. 

...

Aubrey: That is my sister. Her name is Sylvia.
Dental Hygienist: Oh, do you like to play with your sister?
Aubrey: Yeah. We played in my room for a little bit and then we came here
Dental Hygienist: What do you like to play with your sister? Do you like to play with dolls?
Aubrey: Well....actually.....I really like to play with my blocks. 
Dental Hygienist: Oh! What do you like to build with your blocks
Aubrey: I build a REALLY TALL TOWER!
Dental Hygienist: Do you build a tower so tall until it falls over?
Aubrey: No.....actually.....Sylvia knocks my tower over.
Dental Hygienist: Well that's what little sisters are for, huh?

...

Aubrey: Mom, are we coming back to the dentist tomorrow?
Me: No, not tomorrow. 
Random person in waiting room: Probably in six months.
Aubrey: Then where are we going tomorrow?
Me: Well, you're going to go to grandma's tomorrow
Aubrey: (to random person in waiting room): I am not going to come back here tomorrow. I am going to go to my grandma's house tomorrow.
Random person in waiting room: Oh, that will be fun
Aubrey: Yeah, it is going to be SO MUCH FUN!

I Spy

Me: I spy something......white.
Aubrey: Hmm.......oh! I know! Sylvia's Sock!
Me: That is white, but that's not what I'm spying. What else?
Aubrey: Mom! It's Sylvia's sock!
Me: That's not what I spy. What else is white?
Aubrey: Mom! I said it's Sylvia's sock!!
Me: What about my mitten? Is my mitten white?
Aubrey: Mom! I said it's Sylvia's sock! It is not your mitten! I said Sylvia's sock!
Me: I know Sylvia's sock is white, but that is not what I was spying.
Aubrey: I don't want to play this game with you anymore. You are not really good at this game. 

Briefcase

Martin: I am a business professional. I don't know if you realize this, but I have A BRIEFCASE.
Me: That's not a briefcase, that's a children's hard case lunchbox.
Martin: It's not about what it IS. It's about what's INSIDE.
Me: Ha! Ok, what's inside?
Martin: Paperwork. And my phone charger. The charger that I use to charge the phone that I use to network with other young industry professionals.
Me: Hmm. You might have a point. What kind of paperwork do you have?
Martin: My log book. And a day planner........and sometimes my wallet.

-pause-

Martin: Ok, well that might technically qualify it as a purse.
Me: Yeah, I was going to say - that's almost exactly what I have in my purse.
Martin: Well. For one fleeting moment I REALLY had a briefcase.

Alarm Clock

*Thursday Morning*

Martin: So I've been doing this thing with Aubrey when I put her to bed. I can't believe how well it is working
Me: What are you doing?
Martin: Well, I put her to bed and she always says 'I want you to sleep with me'. So lately, the last seven times or so, I've said OK and then I lay down for a second and then I say 'Oh no! Daddy has to go set his alarm. I'll be right back!' And then I don't come back and she falls asleep. 
Me: Ha! 

*Thursday night*

Me: (waking Martin up in Aubrey's bed) Martin, wake up! Come on. Come to our bed. You're in Aubrey's bed.
Martin: Where is the alarm clock?
Me: Your phone is sitting on our bedside table. I just saw it.
-we walk to our room -
Martin: No. Aubrey took my alarm clock.
Me: What?
Martin: I did the alarm clock thing with her. And then I went downstairs for a little bit and then I came back up to take a shower. I was just in the shower and Aubrey opened the door telling me she couldn't sleep. I sent her back to bed and told her I'd be right there. When I got out of the shower Aubrey was sitting up in her bed. She had pulled the alarm clock out of my wall and dragged it to her bedroom.
       Aubrey: Daddy! I got the alarm clock so now we can go to bed!

Ice

Martin: (curling up into bed) Brrr. I am freezing.
Me: (lays into bed and attempts to rub chest with hands)
Martin: Ahhh! What are you doing???
Me: Oh. I was trying to warm you up. I forgot my hands are like icicles. 
Martin: Ha. It's like its opposite day or something. Usually your the one yelling at me for cold hands. Except usually my hands are cold from being outside. Yours are cold because of some weird, hereditary circulation problem. 

Small Crush

Aubrey: I can't wait 'till Cory and the cows see my nails!

....

Aubrey: Are we all done milking?
Me: Yep. Now we just have to clean up.
Aubrey: Yeah. And then we will be all done and Cory will be sooo happy!

....

Aubrey: I think that Sylvia can't wait to see Cory. 

Hypocrite

Me: So....you're going to be really mad at me......
Martin: ...What...
Me: Well....I can't go to Canada to look at cows with you because my passport expired. I know. I'm an idiot. I don't know what I was thinking! I can't believe I did that! I'm going to get it renewed. 
Martin: You're so mad at yourself I feel like I can't even be mad at you. But it does seem a little hypocritical in light of how much flak you gave me to actually get a passport. 
Me: I know! I can't believe I did this. 

my berating of myself continues for a good ten minutes.

Martin: Don't worry about it so much. It took my almost ten years to actually fill out the paperwork and get one. 
Me: I know, but....
Martin: What? You expect less from me than yourself?

Spilled MIlk

Aubrey: Mom, can I please have some paper towels?
Me: Did you spill your milk?
Aubrey: (frantic) Don't come in the living room!!! Can I just have some paper towels?

Grand Central

Amanda: I thought the station was a little bit farther up the street so I was walking and I came to this beautiful building and I was like, what is this beautiful building? Then I realized I'm an idiot and it was Grand Central Station
Me: I had the exact opposite experience looking for my train station. I was expecting it to look like Grand Central Station so every nice building I saw I was like 'is this it?' Turns out it looked like every other train station, a platform with a track on either side. 

On the Train

Woman on the Train: He's kind of fat, you know? Well. like your husband....Now I don't think you're husband is fat at all, but he's kind of like that. Or like your brother Max. 

Planets

Aubrey: Mommy, I love you more than the planets.
Me: Well...I love you more than the planets AND the stars
Aubrey: Well, I love you more than Earth!
Me: I love you more than Jupiter.
Aubrey: Mom! We don't live on Jupiter!
Martin: We don't?
Aubrey: Daddy, no. Don't be silly
Martin: Do we live on Mars?
Aubrey: We live on Earth!
Martin: Oh, ok. Thank you, Aubrey.

pause.

Aubrey: (with a sly look on her face) Do we live on.....Mercury??
Me: Hmm. I don't think so. 
Aubrey: Yeah. I am silly. You should laugh. 

Spooning

Martin: Ok, let's go upstairs and spoon for thirty seconds.
Me: Thirty seconds??
Martin: Well, I feel like I can't sleep when we're spooning so I usually roll over after about thirty seconds
Me: Yeah right! You can sleep anywhere! Usually you fall asleep within thirty seconds. But LATELY everytime we're spooning you're sleeping, it's amazing and then SOME kid starts crying and I have to leave the bed and by the time I get back you've rolled over and the moment is passed. One time recently it was actually Aubrey needing help going to the bathroom.
Martin: The nerve! She should have just peed her pants so we could yell at her for wetting the bed. 

Expletive

Martin: Hey honey! How is your drive going?
Me: Terribly! I'm driving around like an *expletive* idiot. It's *expletive* *expletive* dark and *expletive* raining. I can't find an *expletive* place to park and there are a million *expletive* cars. 
Martin: Ok......well I'm probably going to take you off of speaker phone.
Aubrey: Mommy, I love you!
Me: Oh boy. That's probably a good idea. 

Cats and Dogs

Me: You're going to have so much fun with Kerri and Rob. Kerri is going to bring her dog, Missy.
Aubrey: Really??? I am going to play catch with that dog!
Me: Yeah, I bet she will really like that. Do you remember Missy?
Aubrey: Yeah.
Me: She's a pretty little dog, huh. She's about the size of a cat. 
Aubrey: Mom! Dogs and cats ARE NOT the same thing! Silly!!
Me: Ha! You are right Aubrey, I'm not very smart, am I?
Aubrey: Yeah. You are not that smart. 

Aubrey: Mom, you better text Kerri and tell her to bring a dog bowl so we can give Missy some water. 

Age Appropriate

A phone conversation between Martin and myself circa 9:45 AM Sunday Morning.

Me: It was a really age appropriate birthday. We drank a lot of wine and made gnocchi from scratch. And then eventually we went to the bar for a couple of drinks. Today I feel like I'm going to die. I'm sweating. My whole body hurts.
Martin: Yep. That sounds like a hangover. Clear diagnosis. 

Lots of pauses in conversation.

Martin: Well, you're just blowing me away with your talkativeness. I'll talk to you later, love!

...

A text message from Amanda during said conversation. She's in her room. Less than 6 feet from me, in the living room.

Amanda: I'm dying


...

A conversation between Amanda and myself, minutes later

Me: I can't even function. I was talking to Martin on the phone and I felt like we had been talking forever, I couldn't even say anything. Then when I hung up I realized it had been three minutes and twenty eight seconds. 


I'm pretty sure this is what old feels like.

Honesty

Mom: Sylvia, you threw half of your dinner on the floor.
Dad: That's okay. She'll eat most of it when she gets down.
Martin: Oh good! I do that too. I didn't want to say anything, but if we're being honest I'll go ahead and let her graze off her floor mess. 

Cancelled

*Conversation from a few weeks ago, during a power outage, after an ice storm*

Martin: I bet there won't even be school tomorrow. 
Me: Hmm. Well.....I'm not a teacher and my kids aren't in school so that's really the last thing I care about right now. 
Martin:  I just get so excited thinking that SOMEONE is getting a snow day! Even if its not me.
Me: Ha! You are a much better person than I.....Wait. It's Christmas vacation. There is no school tomorrow anyway.
Martin: Oh man! Those kids are really getting screwed. 

Morning Routine

Me: (putting on blush and mascara. my two makeup staples).
Aubrey: Mom, I need to put my makeuper on. 
proceeds to take chapstick out of bathroom drawer and rub on her lips.
Aubrey: There. I got my makeuper on. Now I look soooo fancy!

repeat. every morning. sometimes before bed.

Excitement

This year was definitely the best Christmas to date because Aubrey was SO EXCITED. On the days leading up to Christmas we had created a paper chain countdown and she woke up every morning saying

Is it a new day today?!!! 

And then promptly running for the scissors to cut a link.

On Christmas morning she came crawling into my bed, body shaking with excitement and whispered

I wonder if Santa Claus came last night!!!!

And each time in the last week when someone has stopped by the house with a wrapped package her whole body has started to tremble with excitement as she shouts

I wonder what it's gonna be!!!!

Oh, to be three again! So glad I can experience the holidays through her eyes!